EPICNEWS, the relaunch

Hello, ladies, gentlemen, slugs, and wierdos, to the new eddition of epicnews! Todays top story, robbed!
It was only a week ago that west middle school of rochester hills was robbed. five teenagers who just turned 17 had commited the crime. The robbery wasnt well thought out though. for one, the teens immeadiatly set of the window security alarm by breaking down the glass. the person not commiting the crime was a lookout, and not a verry good one. she got caught first, and within a few minoutes, the rest were caught as well. they were trying to steal west's suckish laptops, and they arent even real good ones, GET A LIFE! another hot scoop, a hot ice cream scoop, that is.this week will be HOT, HOT, HOT! Go get your little behind to the nearest DQ.thats all for now, kaelan donovan, ace reporter, signing off.